Hello. I understand your concerns about anxiety, which comes from thoughts mainly formed as a product of several cognitive distortions: Sadness from loss of friends and perhaps your independence because of your disease; mainly not understanding the concept that we humans are born, reproduce, get sick(not always), and die. Worrying about the world changing and the future. Regrets for past actions. Regrets over how our life should have been. Is there anything after death? Will we be conscious that we are dead. All these worries lead to anxiety and anxiety leads to suffering. Also some depression over the gray outlook you painted of your life right now. You might want to seek help with managing your emotions…but I don’t see nothing that an antidepressant and a benzodiazepine couldn’t take care of right now , however, temporarily. Problem with the benzodiazepine is that as an undesired effect, causes memory loss in older folks. I recommend getting involved with the resources available to you in order to make your existence better.