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Time to move to retirement home?
Caregivers: Dementia | Last Active: 11 hours ago | Replies (45)Comment receiving replies
@4goakley I appreciate you making this post again, as I'm in a rental from a house that had mold-turned-into-a-full-remodel (and still not ready) so I can sell it and move. During the same time my husband was diagnosed with MCI and is doing every two-week infusions. Our life has been in chaos now for almost a year living in 7 storage units - it's been so overwhelming. To add to the pressure, I have to sell my house, close, take the $ and figure out where we go. Then deal with 7 storage bins of stuff. I'm stuck. Caught up in whether I plan short term and where to go, or plan for long term, where to best go, based on my husband's MCI progression, and whether we'd be best suited in continuing care facility, independent living first or an over 55, with in home care OR in a downsized house in a community, for whatever time, OR some out of state move closer to our adult children who are all spread across different states. Quite frankly, it's been so confusing for me. We love our kids, but their lives are so busy, and my son from another marriage, I never see him. He's in Texas; I'm in Florida. So, my hunch is not to focus on closeness to the kids but figure out the best living situation for our needs now. I just wish I had more clarity. Best, Karla
Best, Karla
Replies to "@4goakley I appreciate you making this post again, as I'm in a rental from a house..."
@kjc48
Hi Karla:
When we recently toured a continuing care facility I felt I was not ready to move there, it just didn't seem like a good fit because most of the residents were a few decades older than us. Since my husband said he liked it there, our scenario may be he's at assisted living and I'm nearby in our home (until I feel like I fit in there).
Who knows how this will all turn out. It's not like we have anything else to do (😒), so we can spend countless hours planning for all sorts of different scenarios, not knowing which direction things will take.
Take it easy. 🤗
@kjc48 Karla, you are juggling so many things and facing so many choices. It is very hard. One option, if youre not ready to make a final decision as to housing might be to move into a rental facility with independent living and assisted living when needed. We did that after we sold our house and were trying to decide what to do next. It gave us time to experience that lifestyle while deciding where to move next. At the same time, we got on a waitlist for a CCRC. After 8 months of also considering a move to be closer to one of our kids, we decided to make the move to the CCRC. It has been a relief to know that assisted living or Memory Care is assured for future needs. Good luck to you!
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@kjc48 Good morning! After just going through a downsizing and a move, I really recommend you do it as soon as possible. It is an overwhelmingly exhausting and emotional time. Take advantage of the opportunity to give away or throw out things you don’t need. For example, I’m amazed at how many mixing bowls, colanders and measuring cups I accumulated. 😄
Also get as much help as you can. My husband was not able to help very much or he didn’t want to. He didn’t want to throw anything away. I had to do much of the sorting and discarding on my own. I understand his strong attachment to our things but we couldn’t fit everything in the new place.