@mglayton72 I can’t imagine all of this. But can relate to your comments when you said this,

“ or me, insomnia is the first symptom to show up and the last symptom to go away. The current Psych NP thinks that trauma is the reason for the insomnia, however, I disagree with him.

I am so tired of not functioning. My executive function is non-existent. I have zero motivation and feel like a total failure.”

As far as insomnia goes-while I don’t suffer overall from it, can certainly be kept awake by not being able to shut off racing thoughts, ideas, anxieties,…all typical adhd issues. Not just ptsd. And absolutely I disagree with doctors, and often must advocate for different paths and explanations of why “this or whatever,” is happening. The best ones truly listen and try to understand and find ways to help or help you navigate locating solutions. It’s a maze and you unfortunately have to be the captain of the ship. If that makes sense!

And not functioning-oh yes!!! Likely anyone reading this, including myself, can relate to this! I feel worthless and unable to complete simple projects, etc. beyond annoying and feeling worthless- leading to being self critical and more.

Zero motivation-certainly without supportive adhd I would lack all motivation,…. And often feel like a total failure. So many circumstances feel this.

I’ve heard little about the testing for the proper treatments based on genes and hope you learn something from it. If so that you can share whatever you learn, as likely many people have an opportunity to also benefit from we are all so different

Have you seen any functional medicine doctors ? I’m seeing one, and while it’s early in my path for this find some of what they offer can be learned online and with some great podcasts that can be very helpful.

One area comes up that I saw in a previous mental health topic brought up having low vitamin D. Now that’s not my issue, but what I’ve gathered from it could be applicable to yourself or some of the others searching for answers to this. Oftentimes levels of vitamins-like Vitamin Deficiency can affect your mood and body/mental health more than given credit for. Having a work up of some overall measures can help balance you. I’m not a doctor, but have tried to understand how this can be implemented and improved if possible

Good luck-you aren’t a failure and i appreciate you Thank you for sharing your ramble. I’m sure my ramble is truly a RAMBLE! Lol