Beautifully written. I fear your pain. If I may, some questions: How old are you; How long ago were you diagnosed & can you be specific on your diagnosis? I am 81. Gleason score 4+3, GG 3. No invasion any where; no cribriform pattern, no intraductal carcinoma, clear PET scan. I have been married 56 years. Both my wife & I are active - including sexually - & feel like we are 60. I am in Houston close to MD Anderson Hospital. I am waiting for an appointment with their prostate team. Being my age, cancer free or not, I do not have many quality years left. I am concerned if I let the doctors cure the cancer, the will have a patient that wishes he were dead. I feel perfectly fine with no physical limitations. I am not sure I should let the doctors work on the cancer while spoiling what may be the best years I have left. I would greatly appreciate your thoughts & input.