Hi
I have intense anxiety in the morning. Anything I try wont go true me. Taking a hot bath...don't even feel the hot water. Muscle to tense. Trying to meditade...nope. The only thing the help are short calm exercices. It can take me an hour to eat my 2 toasts. But I eat them. Lost 15 lbs in 2 months. I take a normal dose of 1 mg of ativan to sleep at night for 3 years. I know it s long but for now I dont realy care. Rarely, like this morning, I take 1 to help me.
I had many losts in last 5 years...divorce. My 2 daughters I love so much are living by there own wich is ok of course, but leave the the house so empty.
After my divorce I was "ok". Ready for a new start..I bought a small simple house by my own, but it was full of MAJOR hidden deffects. Cost me all my of  my energy and a lot of money..
I ve just lost my job. I was working hard in the same well knowne companie for 25 years. Like every where else , they are reorganising, so they closed all my department.
I'm 56 years old, and just feel these are all radical changes happening in the same time. And havent find what path I can take. Anyway for now I m so anxious I have difficulty to think clearly. The place I worked at was difficult and let me with frustrations fatigue and a lost of self worth
My Dc  prescribed me citalopram to try to calm me down. Hope it will work. Starting today at 10mg. Im trying to find a way to see a spychologist but money might be an issue...
After watching tv in the morning. (No news, no stressing serie...). I just lived for the afternoon, with small "missions" . reason to go out and walk and breathe. When I come back at 4pm I'm calmer. The day is almost finished, its starting to get darker. In the afternoon I usually feel better. So in the morning Im always surprised to feel the anxiety back whit so much intensity. So am gratefull to find that  discussion. I feel less alone.
Ps I hope my english is not to bad...
Thanks