It’s a very difficult time for you but talking about it helps by not internalising the grief you are going through it helps to speak about the loss that you have endured like you shared with us complete strangers because everyone of us have suffered the way you are suffering now the trauma of loosing a dear one is very difficult to accept my suggestion to you is to change your routine to something new maybe that will help you to break the cycle of grief look for the inner strength and bring it out find some new hobbies to take your mind off you will still feel a dull ache but it will take your mind off