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Thank you, thank you, thank you for your comments.
Today I went over to the nursing home to "book" his reservation. I need to have all my ducks in a row in advance.
With my own problems from a failed knee transplant by a doctor I found out later had put someone's hip in crooked (in another state) I can't blame H for being scared.
"WE" are doing the pre-surgery exercises though he complains and complains.
He has a TOP NOTCH surgeon for this, and he is going to do the procedure the same way you had done. I have talked to them about my concerns, even the dementia issue. The surgeon usually does his operations in a ambulatory facility, which is very nice, but because of H heart issues it will be in the hospital per his cardiologist.
I am not certain how long he will be in rehab, but you are right. It is going to be paradise for me in getting the house clean, doing things I want to do, etc. We all need a break.
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@kartwk I am glad to hear that things are moving along and that the surgery will be done in hospital. I personally think that it is a better place for a patient that has a cardiac history.
I am especially glad to hear that you will have a break from caregiving so you can renew your spirit and restore your mental health. You can sleep late, eat whatever you want, go whenever you want, visit friends, get your hair done, mani/pedicure, massage, etc. All self care items in my book.
The other good thing about having your husband go to the nursing home is that they will be the ones dealing with his post-op pain and getting him up and moving around. You won't have to deal with that. I am thinking that with his hip pain taken care of your husband will be in better spirits and be easier to be around. I know I was a happy camper after the surgical pain resolved. God bless you and keep you strong.