@craigcraig I have read all the comments and I empathize with your situation. I see both sides, honestly. I am in recovery and have been sober for several years now. I am 55 years old and was in treatment at 14, 19, 30 and detox again at 41 (I think, hard to remember). Anyway, my mom use to say, "as long as you were alive, we had hope." (my family). My partner of 28 years died from this disease. He was 56 years old. It is a reality. Having said that, he was the same when it came to AA. I suggest you read the first 146 pages of the AA Big Book. It might help you understand her, how you can help or not, there is a specific chapter to the Agnostics, and family. I also think Al-anon would help. They are available on Zoom if you don't want to get out. You don't even have to say anything, you can just listen. She is the only one who has the choice. If she is entertaining treatment, whether outpatient or inpatient, that is a good sign. Sounds like the justice system is enabling her. Maybe this latest DUI will produce some results. Sometimes judges will order treatment in lieu of jail, put an ankle monitor on that can detect alcohol...I hope so. I know this is brutal to watch. When I got sober 12/16/17, I was at the bottom. My brother refused to talk to me unless I quit drinking. I am going to post a link to the Big Book, here. I will also post al-anon information. Hang in there. One day at a time. I know it is painful to watch and to be powerless over her alcoholism.