C ece, First my condolences, I know exactly what you are experiencing. I lost my wife of 72 years exactly six months ago tomorrow. At my age (92) I know that I will never have time to stop grieving. However, what has kept me afloat is the "Hope" grief support team that I joined shortly after my wife passed, (as well as caring family and friends). It is a group of people who have lost a spouse of partner. We meet once a week, under the guidance of three leaders - also widows. I believe the group that your hospice team is scheduling you for will be a very good source of advice and support. Please try to keep yourself busy - I go food shopping about three time a week, needed or not, just to get out of the house. I also have two dogs that keep me busy and also attend events at the library to keep my mind occupied. Life will never be the same, but you can adjust to small changes, adopt a pet, cat or dog, if you can. A different source of entertainment might help. Learn a new language, or hobby. volunteer at a local animal welfare facility, if available, or with your hospice team, they always need people for various functions. Just stay strong, take care of yourself while you grieve, keep those fond memories of him utmost in your thoughts, they will help you.
My best to you, stay well, time will heal some things, some things will never heal, accommodate those things and you will more than able to move on. You also made a good choice of posting your position on this site, you will find a lot of very empathetic people here, who will provide you good advice and support.
Again, best to you, take care of yourself.