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Peaches, @magspierce Jim
I understand that. I have had to go no contact with my narcissistic mother and family of flying monkeys that aided in her horrible physical & verbal snd mental abuse.
Walking away from my whole family and getting healthy was the best thing that I ever did. I have found my own family. In my life blood is NOT thicker than water
And the hardest thing after was figuring out how not to run away like a bat out of hell every time I felt uncomfortable. And I felt uncomfortable a lot! When you are a child and the very people that are supposed to give you love and protection are your abusers, trust and self worth are only words to you.
Just know that you can get through it...and little by little you learn how to let people get past that wall of protection that you have built up around you.
There is a website called Out of the Storm, the first time I read the pages, I just couldn't stop crying with every word I found I wasn't alone in my pain... and just knowing that made me stronger.
Google complex PTSD quotes and you will see you are not alone! There are number of sites and blogs that can start you in the right direction with advice on things like how to find a therapist who understands the "complex".
((( hug))) to all of you!
Replies to "Peaches, @magspierce Jim I understand that. I have had to go no contact with my narcissistic..."
I know that many people have had to break away from their toxic families. As you said, it's not natural. They're the people we're supposed to turn to and lean on, who never stop loving us. Unfortunately, it doesn't work out that way every time.
As children, we were a very close family, but as we grew up and had families of our own, we kind of drifted apart. Not that we stopped loving each other, but the next generation became our primary focus. I was the last holdout to get a computer and get reconnected online, and then on cell phones. I feel more connected with my siblings now than I did for a long time. I can't really imagine what it would be like never to see or hear from them again. It's good that you have other families.
Jim
hi, yes i ran, i ran to the courts at that time. so instead of continuing my education i was a slave to the aunt who took me in. clean, babysit, shop, etc. BUT, NOT ALLOWED SCHOOLING. instead, go to work, give all my salary to her and her husband and still continue the household chores. to sleep on the couch with the rodents, yes, the rodents who would jump on my face. and they would tell me i am lying until their dog mitzi ran and caught one. while they were in their beds in their bedrooms. (a mind going to waste). at least they fed me. but we all know that there is much worse that happens to us. and how can one weed out the also mentally ill therapists and be able to see an acceptable one? keep trying if you can afford it. meanwhile we are all still waiting for acceptable health care. ohhhh! there are no ptsd therapy groups in my entire county unless you pay for it. this is done for alcoholics (most in the churches) why can we not please have this for us ptsd people? i have tried. i still appreciate all who are on this site. with care, peachbarb
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@wendallzmom
Thank you for your encouragement. I'm going to try to remember to talk about complex PTSD. I don't know if I'll have time at my next appointment on Thursday because I already have some important issues to begin working through, but I'll put it on my list of things to talk with the doctor about. I keep a list in Evernote on my phone.
Jim