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Depression, fibromyalgia and spinal degeneration
Depression & Anxiety | Last Active: Nov 8, 2018 | Replies (47)Comment receiving replies
@virtuous Hi Dori, I agree with what Kanaaz said with regards to the 'big picture'. It is easy to get overwhelmed when things have gotten away from you. I break my tasks down into small ones. I find that if I compartmentalize each thing or area, I do better. For example, when deciding what to tackle in your home: you could say to yourself, 'Just for today, all I have to do is Scrub the toilet. That's it. Next say, "all I have to do is , scrub the bathroom sink. Then, the next day give yourself a small task. Then, everyday give yourself a small task. Delegate to your husband too. You said his back hurts, let him fold laundry on the sofa. A little bit here and a little bit there gets the job done. One feels better when they are busy. That is my take anyway. Hugs, Terri
Replies to "@virtuous Hi Dori, I agree with what Kanaaz said with regards to the 'big picture'. It..."
@virtuous - How long have you been married? I am at an Emerald "Double Nickels" 55 & counting... Is your husband a "Slow Learner?" What does he not understand about the "Do" in "I Do?" Inform him that @catgic Sez the utterance of the "Until Death 'Do' Us Part...I Do" on your Wedding Day means he signed up for "HONEY DO DUTY FOR LIFE." Just saying... B|
@ catgig. Enjoyed the humor in your post. First of all I need to tell you that I accidentally created this secondary account of virtuous. My main account is virtuous69 and my name is Dori.
My husband is 79 a really good man but he's Swedish and like his father and older generation, was just as stubborn wouldn't lift a finger around the house. The women did the housework and the cooking and the men did the yard. Well my husband has no visual concept of of what makes a beautiful yard except to plant straight bushes , with no sense of dynamic or coordination, you know that type of thing. So he will work outside once in a while and hedge the bushes on his day off but we've had an agreement of what kind of household chores we would take and that he's to give me half an hour a day. That hardly ever happens he's lost most of his hearing so that causes a lot of arguments and sometimes I just wish I could bang him over the head with it iron skillet. But he's a wonderful Christian man, he loves me deeply and tells me everyday how much he loves me. He's actually working at his age while he's hurting also, to keep me alive.We,re in a high cost of living area (Silicon Valley) in a nice senior mobile home park, but the space and mortgage payments outstrip our income.Afterrhe lost his job hours and I had to go on disability. So it's really kind of funny because he's such a Charming Man and a good man but
won't lift a finger to help me when he sees how much pain I'm in.I want to scream. And posting this type of thing really seems to make some of your co -posters very angry like I'm a some sort of them prima Donna.ps We have been married 47 years. I am 69 with health issues, the total spinal package, Fibromygia and the kitchen sink.I just want to have a little fun...won't bore you with details of why we don't walk or swim, and how we've become arm chair potatoes. That is why I started a post for depression. Having had a little spending money before my husband,s company fired it's famous Fortune 500 company CEO and took away all our benefits, we managed and a wonderful group of church friends. That is why I enjoy hearing from some of you. My best friend and confident passes away. My normally sane and wonderful husband can get very nervous when it's time to pay the rent. He literally becomes Henny Penny and runs around in circles. We've had so much marrital counseling that he would never keep up with. My being in pain, in bed 1/2 the day certainly doesn't help matters at all with his depression and my guilt.. You all have such horrific issues you face daily that I can't begin to walk a mile in your shoes. I beileve God allows each of us different trials. But depression is very real. Crazy, but having a little money to live and some to share is a great blessing.Thank you folks for being "real" and be willing to share your humor and vulnerabilities.
Blessings, Dori
As I was looking through some posts I came upon this one and realized that you haven't posted in a while. I hope you are both doing well. I would enjoy hearing from you.
Teresa
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Windwalker. I agree with all of you. But forget about delegating anything to my husband. He loves me, prays for me and won't lift a finger. Period. I'll do it later, and 3 weeks go by.Original Archie Bunker. But I'm no Edith. He does what little he wants WHeN he wants.He has become sloppy and contributes to our mess. That,s why I joined the depression Discussion Group. I need to vent! Now I have a painful dental abscess ,on powerful antibiodic, and need immediate root canal or teeth extraction. Husband just took out dental insurance which Will not cover these majors for one year. After back and rotator cuff pain subsides I usually fix a meal run Laundry, and water outside. Heat wave CA has been thru Labor Day weekend has been unbearable. I do better when my husband is at work for 3 days. He brings great depression into our house. He relies on me to.be his social calendar. Nothing on the radar without pocket change...have paid up .most of our monthly bills. Will get up now and fix us a meal. Stand ding on God,s promises and asking Him for motivation to get going. Nice to hear from you. Dori.