Dear Tom,
I only wish I had a "magic wand" to wave to help you; unfortunately I do not. That being said, I STRONGLY agree with contacting the Mayo Clinic for help, getting to a Teaching Hospital, and I would add contacting The Office of The Aging and an Economic Opportunity Foundation in your county. Should all of these fail, contact a national TV station like ABC, NBC or CBS for help (trust me you will be surprised how quickly your local government agencies respond !) I most certainly can relate; I am a 77 year old female, with merely a high school diploma who fought her way up corporate ladders only to be one week away from being appointed VP of a large stevedore company (trust me, this was not a woman's business); and while porting a new ship had a massive stroke. The original diagnosis I was given was a genetic blood disorder called Leiden Factor V. I was 57 years old and my healthy active body only proceeded to go downhill from there. Both of my "metal" hips are now worn, the stents in my heart are probably worn, arthritis has set in, my L4 has been herniated for years, and RA is crippling my body now. I too, did a heck of a lot of therapy to gain as much mobility back, and YES my choice of therapy now at my age was "water therapy", unfortunately like yourself, our nearby pool was lost in a flood a few years ago and there are no others nearby. And...I loved it ! I too struggle with my weight, I am 5'4" and now weigh 170lbs. I used to be 5'7" and weigh 140 lbs! The loss of height is due to bone shrinkage; but don't dare ask me where 30lbs came from. I am so careful with my diet. Two weeks ago my doctor and I decided to add a new med to my regime to help with the pain; it is called Gabapentin, yes it helps, however the water retention just may cause me to stop using it. Bottom line, my friend, I too can most certainly relate to isolation, both physical, mental and emotional pain. I am so sorry to hear that you are in this place. Tom, I ask you to fight for your life. NO, it will never be the same. HOWEVER, it is my belief (on a good day) that if one does nothing, and gives up then we will just sink into a deep dark hole. You CAN do this. You have already started. you have reached out for help merely by contacting this site. All of that being said, I will add you to my prayers.