Beth, all I can say from my disability is that whether you do or not does not mean life is over or less. What it does mean is that life is different. But was your life before, when you were an Educator, the same as when you were a child romping through life? No, it was different. Now you have new issues on your mind, concerns to deal with just like the Educator had over the child.
Do we want the pain, the fatigue? No, but it comes with the challenges. And the joy if we make the effort to find that as well.
I’ll be praying that you find it all including the mission.