@sunnyflower @bustrbrwn22 @jesfactsmon

Thank you all for your concern and encouragement.

@sunnyflower. The reaction was just related to Lyrica, and everything went back to normal after being off it for 2 days. That's the first time anything like that has happened to me. When I start a new medication I'm aware of the effects they have the first few weeks - usually cognitive deficit and maybe drowsiness - but as my body adjusts to it, those things fade away.

My way of dealing with suicidal thoughts: I think about how it would impact my wife and family; I tell myself I will stay safe until...whatever goal I have, usually an upcoming visit with our kids and grandchildren; I promise myself to put the thoughts on hold until tomorrow.

Hank, I've never owned a gun, which is probably a good thing, since that's the most common method for men. Pills are usually readily accessible for me, so that's been my mode. @bustrbrwn22. 200 sleeping pills! Someone found you? I'm sure that's why your doctors don't want to prescribe narcotics for you. They care about your safety. Have you ever been able to set goals for staying alive? When I started doing that, I could only project to one day, and after some months of that I could do a week, and so on. Being able to set a goal 6 months out was a big accomplishment.

I know that when neuropathy pain got bad it affected my depression and suicidality. There's an ongoing link between pain and mental ill-health for me. I talk with my therapist about that often.

Gotta quit for tonight. Thanks again, everyone.

Jim