@louissc
Hi Louis!
Please forgive my absence these past days — I had a minor surgery last week and have only just been able to catch up on Connect today. All is well and I'm recovering nicely.
I want to say how much I appreciate your openness and honesty in sharing what you've been going through and how you've been feeling. As I may have mentioned before, my first two years of epilepsy treatment — from 2019 to 2021 — were very difficult, and I too had some dark thoughts during that time. I believe this is an experience many of us in this group have been through, though we don't often speak openly about it. It takes real courage to speak so openly, and I admire your attitude very much.
I'm truly glad you're still here, and I mean that sincerely. I admire your remarkable resilience and sense of humor. Finding joy in KFC, appreciating what you can still do, treating your caregiver as a friend — these remind me of an exercise my yoga teacher recommended during my own dark times, when my plate felt so full and I was dealing with so much daily that there seemed to be very little to celebrate. She encouraged me to acknowledge every positive aspect of my day — the small, basic things I'd once taken for granted and was now struggling with. I called it my Santosha exercise — santosha meaning contentment in Sanskrit. Through it, I realized that even while struggling, I still had much to be grateful for, and it helped me recognize the progress I was making with my new treatment, which I was starting at that time. My glass felt a little fuller every day.
I hope Briviact works well for you, and please do keep us posted on your decision about NTUH. I believe there's great wisdom in ancient healing traditions such as TCM and Ayurveda. Years ago, I met an Indian woman living in the US who, through a combined treatment of Western medicine, Ayurveda, and a specific yoga practice carried out by a hospital in India, became seizure-free for several months and greatly improved her quality of life. This stayed with me.
Keeping my fingers crossed for you and wishing you brighter days ahead. And one last thought — have you perhaps considered the support of a neuropsychologist during these challenging times? It made a real difference for me.
Chris