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@woojr at first, I thought you were reading my mind. My mom will be 93 next month, lives alone, has had a few falls but nothing too serious - yet.
She also walks around the house holding onto things and refuses to wear hearing aides. She doesnt drive anymore, thankfully.
She has lost weight, down to about 95, and has lost a lot of memories but can still make her own food using a microwave and keeps small bottles of water in the fridge to encourage herself to drink (she has mild sjogrens).
I go by everyday in the afternoon to make sure she remembered her medicine (not much) and has a plan for lunch and dinner.
She often can sleep from 10 at night until 2 or 3 pm unless someone wakes her up.
Is this a typical pattern? Is it bad to let her sleep longer than 12 hours?
It’s hard to know when to intervene or back off.
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@renee17, It's almost impossible to know when to back off. I've had that situation this past week. She was telling us her breathing was a little difficult. I asked her all the usual questions thinking possible heart failure. She told me she was okay and I reminded her to call 911 if she felt typical heart attack symptoms. We've been through these many times. About three months ago she called 911 when her BP spiked. I praised her for her action instead of calling me. So today she called my wife while we were out, complaining of difficulty breathing. My wife told her to call 911. I waited a few minutes, called her back and she hadn't called 911. In fact she was beginning to sound confused. About ten minutes later, her neighbor called us and said the ambulance was there.
She's doing well tonight. I won't say what she said when we got to the hospital but I think she's beginning to accept the idea that she can die. The ball was in her court and she chose 911. If she hadn't I was going to call 911 but she doesn't know it.
So yes, it's very hard to intervene. If they die because you didn't, I think you know how you'll feel forever.