@rpogatchnik1590 Both are fair choices.

I've been with my partner for 39 years, and we've chosen to work through rough patches together; I feel that the reward now far outweighs the effort it took then, but also, it was never transactional.

OTOH, when you're already dealing with prostate cancer, you might not have the energy to work on repairing a relationship together too. @madisonman0326 did find that energy and I hope he is happy with the result now, but everyone's situation is different, so I wouldn't condemn either choice. As I mentioned in an earlier post, the important thing is to be honest with yourself about what's happening and what you want. Also, if you determine that a relationship is emotional abusive rather than just temporarily in trouble, then yes, you need to leave.

Muddling along can be the worst of all worlds (but even that is sometimes the least-bad choice, especially since cancer and divorce can both be expensive in the U.S., so staying in a less-than-ideal relationship might mean the difference between secure food and shelter or poverty for both of you).

tl;dr - it's complicated. 🙁

@rpogatchnik1590 My hope is that the therapy will help her see how unfair she’s being but, I admit I weighed my options. I said there’s no romantic relationship between me and my training partner but that’s not entirely true - she has had a crush on me for a couple years now but what she what she was attracted to was the athlete who won races and that guy left the building last year when I was diagnosed.
When I considered my options, I realized that my training partner and my life partner are remarkably similar in both history and personality so leaving one for the other wouldn’t solve anything - same issues, different woman. For me, it made sense to work on the relationship I have than to start a new one with a similarly high-strung woman.
Here I am with two of my teammates at the finish of an endurance ride: