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Am I grieving?? Asking for some help please.
Loss & Grief | Last Active: 16 hours ago | Replies (5)Comment receiving replies
Firstly, the "you" who is speaking now is clear, cogent, insightful, and intelligent. If I can ask, Who is that?
That "I" doesn't sound broken or split. She can "nurture" all the others to be closer together.
The split(s) are a primal protective defense mechanism to keep you from being completely broken down by the trauma(s). (Donald Kalsched).
Since you can't right now pull it all together into full consciousness, you end up grieving in bits and pieces, which is not Flushing out the trauma(s) and freeing you.
Carl Jung worked on healing by making the unconscious conscious, in small steps (alchemy) until the Self could be unified and whole - "I know who I am and can embrace myself, therefore allowing me to embrace others and Life itself."
Jung said the goal is not perfection. It's Wholeness.
Maybe some work with a good Jungian analyst and healing exercises might work, or you can get the books, recordings, downloads, podcasts, videos, and DIY. 🙏
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@shmerdloff
And hopefully soon the feelings of grief felt can touched on for us. Trying to ‘take the edge’ off of current emotional and sensory overwhelm to do what we can right now to make the world more tolerable. Since this all will likely take a very very long time it’s all about as much stability. And foreign feelings felt so strong really throw things over the edge.
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@shmerdloff
Thank you for the comment back and the advice, support, and insight. My name is Cadence, I’m not sure what my logistical name is and I’m leaving that question up to our system mapper/gatekeeper but she’s talking a break from fully fronting for a few days. I do know my role consists of external communication and decision making and I have an almost perfectionist way of needing to word things correctly which sometimes is overwhelming. but I use what I know of the system to try to ask helpful questions when I front and using a forum we all have access to and will hopefully look back on when needed. I sometimes take some notes for the system mapper for later but am less concerned with the ‘right now’ like she sometimes get stuck on it takes a sec for her to step away sometimes so we can just live but she doesn’t mean to. I’m aware of current situations and know traumatic memories exist but don’t really go back into them, I’m very mindful of present circumstances and our common goal to move ahead with our lives but maintain knowing the past needs addressing at the proper times. I’m not very emotional, through the system though we have little affective empathy, but like all of us I have cognitive empathy n compassion. I write more than I talk out loud. And it’s seams more of this when I’m physically alone. It’s another who coordinates day to day stuff to set up for future things, and another who speaks with our therapist. And many many others. some hold trauma, strong emotions, certain memories, and a number of others specific helpful daily roles of just life and protection or communication functions. I feel there’s good multiplicity going on and currently are doing the best we can by being self aware and still working towards proper therapies and resources to help. We all over explain everything if inquired about I’m sure is longer than what was necessary 🤦♀️ thank you again for the comment and some things for us to pursue!!!