Connect
← Return to Discussion on the topic of libido
Discussion
Discussion on the topic of libido
Aging Well | Last Active: Mar 26 9:25pm | Replies (22)Comment receiving replies
Actually, I’ve been quite upset about this non-existent libido since post menopausal times. I’m now age 66. Used to make a joke about the volleyball scene in the movie, Top Gun, always “doing it” for me. In my younger years, I was extremely active. Now, I consider myself a nun. My biggest concern is losing my husband - good grief.
My cervical dystonia rules my life - makes me exhausted and in pain. Feel drugged up all the time. Have spoken to OB/GYN and other doctors about this. The former says that some just choose to have sec on special occasions or 1x/year.
Difficult to think of sex. It also “irritates” me if I want to just hug my husband, that he goes straight to groping me. (Ironically, I don’t blame the man. I just can’t feel anything). I’m to the point where I’ll just lay naked and say, “do what you want!” Now excuse the candor/sarcasm here. I do and will continue to try various options. Kissing is a marvelous start. Guess I need to find better timing.
I don’t want to take testosterone of estrogen due to my family’s cancer history.
Thank you for sharing your experiences.
Replies to "Actually, I’ve been quite upset about this non-existent libido since post menopausal times. I’m now age..."
@pmhpesp5
Something in your message makes me sad.
It seems that you love your husband and you want to be tender and intimate with him, but both of you don't really know what to do.
Intimacy at 65 or 70, or with illness, may not be the same as it was at 35. And it seems you may both still be thinking in terms of 35.
There are so many books you might share and talk about. One of them might speak to your needs.
It seems to me that talking is the most needed part, and maybe could lead to some new discoveries. Deep, honest sharing is the most wonderful intimacy, and might lead to new ways of physical connection.
It's not easy, I know. I wish the best to you, and to all of us who need loving connection.
Connect
@pmhpesp5
I'm sorry for your plight. Hugging and intimacy are an important part of our lives and do more than just initiate arousal. Sounds like your husband is frustrated and misinterprets your intentions. Have you tried giving him a hj just for his pleasure and then cuddling? Any way to take the edge off could make him less frantic both this time and next. I'm a 73 year old man btw.