@pmdel congratulations on the novel! It sounds like you have a lot going on and it also sounds like you have a pretty good life relatively speaking. I believe everybody on this planet has something they’re struggling with and for you it’s the chronic pain and the depression. If you got that managed, it would probably change to something else so count your blessings is what I can suggest! having a kitty to cuddle Is better than an aggravating friend that you can’t quite depend on or trust. I think I get along so well with my dog that he makes human beings pale in comparison, lol.! life is short. Try to make the best of it. In the end, I know I’m going to have regrets about having alowed little things to upset me time and again and not use my time a little more wisely. We will never be as young as we are at this very moment so take life with all the gusto available to you. it seems I never have enough time to do all the things I’d love to do in a day before I run out of energy to do them. And make sure my pain is well controlled over the course of the day that is part of the reason why I can be productive and I can feel satisfied when all is said and done. I hope you will find that blessing too.