This is terrific--an inspiring approach. I don't feel like a very different person than I was 3 1/2 years when I was diagnosed with a rare aggressive breast cancer. I've had a fair amount of experience with death in my 71 years and I certainly feel old, but in a positive way. Being a grandma and being accepted as ancient but loved in any case is a great way to go. I'd say the only thing that has changed/improved is my relationship with my husband. It's always been close, caring, supportive and fun--and the diagnosis shook the relationship with the specter of loss. We got some advice to be more "aspirational" which seemed impossible, as we were hanging on in the midst of oncology. However, we were able to take that to heart. We've been emphasizing our shared love of travel, and giving less weight to those little things that can cause judgement. So this was an unimagined positive change. Otherwise, a bit embarrassingly, I think I'm still the person I was at 16--care about the same things, similar emotions. I think your questions in and of themselves are helpful. It helps to take a fresh view and see that we do have agency. Thanks!