@dmbwa99362
I am about your age, and have had the same pressing thoughts. Plus, I am 24/7 carer for my 94 year old father—a front row seat to the indignities of aging. So, there is no escaping! Plus, I am pretty isolated (care requires it), and have limited freedom right now over my own schedule/life. Everything is about going to doctors, med schedules, his bodily functions, etc etc—I’ll spare you the gory details! But besides worrying and feeling for him, there is that constant niggling thought in the back (and sometimes front) of my brain—that’s going to be you soon….!
As a Christ follower, I am finding it helpful to spend more time in the Bible and prayer. Jesus promises to never leave us or forsake us. I have to keep my eye on that. He never promises to take away the scary things—sometimes He does, sometimes He doesn’t. I have found grace where I really didn’t expect it (but of course, should have!)! This year I started a new journal and rather than venting my fears and frustrations in it, as I have journals before (and then shredded because I do not want to leave behind that legacy if something happens to me), I have a goal of recording things I am grateful for, prayers and answers to prayers. I am hoping that that will help keep my mind on positive things rather than negative. It is a constant human battle—this mind set. (But I have also found it helpful to vent feelings in a journal without censor. It’s just at this point I feel like it will be good for me to focus on the positives. I’m no PollyAnna, my mind is constantly looking at worse case and strategizing…). I love what others have written about health goals, helping others, noticing beauty around us. None of us know when our time here will be up (my younger brother died unexpectedly last year—surreal). I never thought I would be bothered by this, but I sure get where you are coming from. There is so much I still want to see and do in this world, even if the next promises to be even better! If you are the same, and are free do to them—go for it!!! Blessings, we are all in this together!

Oh! Also, there are other threads under this heading—like “please list three things you appreciate about aging,” and “how do you change the perception of aging”—I probably don’t have the exact wording correct, but look for those. There are some really inspiring responses. There is one woman who is 91 and still driving, cognitively strong and independent! Who knows…..? (And sorry this is so long—I did say I am pretty isolated…..haha!)