← Return to Depression and over-analyzing how I feel: I'm feeling invisible

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Profile picture for Scott R L @scottrl

So sorry you're feeling this way. This is a tough time of year for many people, for many reasons.

It's like playing a slot machine in a big casino; it seems like everyone's hitting a jackpot except you. I remember 30 years ago, my girlfriend dumped me two days before Christmas. "Happy Holidays, Loser!" -- at least it felt that way.

After my stroke seven years ago, I was shocked when I would go out and see a familiar face -- and they didn't acknowledge me. They didn't see Scott; they saw Old Disabled Man and looked away.

I know that being aware that others are unhappy is cold comfort. If you break a leg, knowing that others have broken legs doesn't make your own hurt any less.

One thing I learned from this site: Helping others can help you. Offering supportive words to others, even complete strangers, feels good. Try it. It's easy, it's safe, and it's a Good Thing. One way to become visible is to be a light to people who are in an even darker place. Don't over-think it, just try it.

Here's a video from my YouTube channel about this (completely non-professional) experience:

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Replies to "So sorry you're feeling this way. This is a tough time of year for many people,..."

@scottrl your experience of Christmas 30 years ago brought back memory of a similar experience - except I was dumped at Valentine’s, via a Valentine card, about 48 years ago! Looking back on it, the method of delivery itself was a clue to his maturity so it was just as well we broke up because not long after that I met and married my husband with whom I celebrated 46 years recently.

@scottrl thanks for sharing. I was always active and independent and since covid everything has gone wrong. It's been almost a year finding the right meds and still not sure they're right. Can't drive or walk anymore.

@scottrlThank you Scott. Today is Jan 1 so Happy New year to you. I had planned to start a new routine today but my excuse is that I didn't get any sleep last night. I'm sorry you had a stroke and I'm happy you're learning to live with it. My husband passed 2007 and I'm just now realizing that I am going to have to take repairs into my own hands. That's what I'll be up to this year .