@grammato3 Thanks for providing this forum. It's the only one I'm on regarding medical issues because I know it's well monitored and moderated, and that misinformation won't be allowed here.

I mean, it's Mayo.

I don't use social media for my health advice. Truth be told, I've all but completely pulled off of social media altogether. Which was also a good mental health move.

I'm not opposed to antidepressants despite my experience with them. They very much do save lives. What happened in my case is uncommon enough that the psychiatrist I see had not previously encountered it. But she couldn't deny the evidence of her own eyes regarding how quickly I spun around after getting off them. There was an interim period between when I went off of the antidepressant and when I began the lamictal when the improvement was already very evident to her. There are NIH and BMJ studies documenting what occurred as rare, but known. She had seen them, but hadn't witnessed it in real time. She told me she's now using her observations with me as a reference point in case she suspects another patient might be dealing with the same outcome.

I credit getting off of the antidepressant as life saving. I came frighteningly close to ending it, and suspect I would have if I'd stayed on that trajectory. I credit the lamictal for bringing a lifetime of depression cycles to a halt. I've gone two years now without one. I used to experience three or four extended periods of depression a year, and that dates back to grade school (I'm now 61). Mentally I've never felt better. It was a very rough road, but it ended well.

I'm a writer by trade and at some point intend to publish my story. Again, I don't want to condemn antidepressants or scare people from using them. But I do think people should know the warning signs if something is going wrong. For me it was daily and escalating suicidal thoughts, uncontrollable anger, eating and sleep disorders, substance abuse, hygiene issues, violent fantasies, and more. All of it out of character for me. And all of it vaporized within weeks of stopping the medication (that I didn't need alcohol rehab in the aftermath is, along with still being alive and still being married, one the the three things I'm most thankful for). If I can save just one person from going through the hell I endured, it's worth going fully public.