I feel for you both, and can relate!
I think I've finally realized that the problem is more mechanical than anything else, and that it matters less WHAT I eat than what form it's in. I hardly eat during the day, and when I do eat I try to stick with things that could get through a small straw. So I've become the Smoothie Queen!
You can buy good pre-made smoothies, but they're expensive. So I have a bunch of ingredients on hand to run through the blender. I'm going to list them here if it helps; pretty much any combination tastes good and is healthy:
--milk (cow, soy, oat, almond, etc.--they all have different nutrients)

--protein powder--I prefer whey, because it makes things creamier

--Greek yogurt

--bananas!

--frozen berries of all kinds

--peanut butter

--kale and or spinach (you hardly taste them when they're blended with the other stuff)

--canned coconut cream (yummy!)

--rolled oats and flax meal

--firm tofu

--carrot, prune, and other juices

That's all I can think of for now. I'm a vegetarian (not vegan), so that helps. And, not to be gross (but I think the people here will understand!), I keep in mind how various things would taste coming back up again...so meat and seafood would be out anyway. 😱😱