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@londonex
Wow this describes my life to a tee!!
Strictly housemates who seem to hate everything about each other after 30 years of marriage and two wonderful grown kids.
I’ve hesitated, leaving for fear of alienating, my children, which would kill me. But if they’re grown ages, they know what’s going on, and I tend to think now that they would be accepting of the decision as long as it meant that mom and dad would be slightly happier. Such a tough situation that seems so intractable and unsolvable at times. The sad part is that while all of this introspection has gone on, time has marched on and I fear it is too late to make such a significant change. The ultimate choice is between walking to the end of the diving board and deciding to dive into an uncertain pool of water or sticking with a safe, but painful and isolating existence.
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@londonex
When I read your latest post you used the word painful to describe your marital situation. My gut reaction was to get you to leave for self-preservation, since you may get depressed (if you aren't already). Seems like your soul is just longing for something to change.
I am speaking from the heart because our marriage has little love and lots of loneliness. Our situation is due to my husband's dementia, so I just have to live with a loveless marriage since I am his caregiver. I do still love my husband, however there is no affection, no consideration, none of the things we used to have that I long for.
Seems like you could rescue yourself though, if you can leave your marriage and aren't tied down like I am.
All the best to you. 🪻
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@londonex, I was married twice and neither marriage was successful, I never married again but I set up home with a friend and that was over 30 years ago, I think it lasted because we never married, go figure!