18 years ago I had stage 4 tonsil and tongue cancer with a few lymph nodes involved. I had surgery ,Dr couldn’t quite get it all. Then I had targeted radiation therapy and chemo. I did both at same time. I did have sores in my mouth, I used lidocaine viscus constantly, it numbs the inside of your mouth. I never threw up , doctors have wonderful medications to take that feeing away.i was given 1to2 years to live. So 18 years later I am fine. When I was diagnosed I wanted that crap out of me 2 days later it was. Probably you would’ve find one person on here that wasn’t afraid. I was more afraid after treatments of cancer coming back.Whatever fear I originally had was wiped away watching both my daughters get married, watching 1–2–3 grandchildren come along. There are ups and downs as in everyone’s life. I don’t understand what an alternative treatment would be. You have cancer growing in your body everyday. This is your decision and your life. My husband is a doctor, if his patient refuses to do what he says you have to do to save your foot, he also would not waste his time with someone who has a death wish. You are very ill . You need to call your doctor and. Get an appointment so so can live. No one makes that choice by you. You will have to explain to receptionist that you need help and you want to live, because they might not want to give you appointments. If you can do that then we can text and I will go thru it with you. Get the cat scan and see if cancer has moved. But we will get thru that.