I understand all to well. At 32 I was diagnosed with colorectal cancer and had my whole colon and 35-40% of my rectum removed(radiation and chemo both prior to and after surgery) . That was 5 years ago and I hope estly believe im losing ground regarding the severity and frequency of my diarrhea, not to mention the damaged nerves that cause any and all restrooms experiences to feel as tho I am ejecting pure sulfuric acid out my tear end. Daily I am prescribed 1000uL octriatide, 20mg lomotil and I still have to take upwards to 30+ immodium a day just so I don't have to literally live on the toilet, im seriously not kidding. , I was ph.d physical chemist, pharmaceutical research chemist, and lab manager prior to my diagnosis but this has destroyed any chance of holding down any job . I wish I could relate it to tigh rope walking but even that can learned with practice. My life has been utterly destroyed, chaos has replaced any and all routines, and I've given up on any future dreams...the icing on the cake..my fiance left me because I was bringing her down. I dont know if this brings any comfort but youre not alone in the misery....