First of all, I have an awful lot of inner pride for the physical improvements I’ve made and the hard work I put in physical therapy to get from wheelchair to wobbling unassisted. I am thankful for what I can achieve today vs when I got my sudden crippling PN handicap. But that’s not what other people know or see.

Where I struggle with self-confidence is how other people look at me. No, it’s not my imagination, and it’s not just little kids who stare a little too long. I was 51 (now 60). I get looks assessing me when I get out of my handicapped spot or grab an electric cart in the store. I get much more compassion though and people offering me assistance, but for those that look at me like I’m damaged or contagious, it doesn’t help with self confidence. I had a person “joke” that I needed to be cut off at a social once because I wasn’t walking straight (I don’t even drink).

Maybe it’s more self awareness vs self confidence and that little bit of sadness that comes with what I’ve lost. Overall my inner pride wins over the awkwardness that I might feel around others, for they don’t know what they don’t know. As @njed has coached, I try to stay positive and focus on what I CAN do!