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Downsizing, To Move or Not to Move? That is the Question
Aging Well | Last Active: 1 day ago | Replies (575)Comment receiving replies
@tsch I agree! Totally we should get a health care proxy before dementia complicates things, and have a conversation with that person about what we would want. My personal problem is that my health care proxy is someone who is the same age I am, which is something I need to put on my list to fix.
And yes, giving up a car is one of the hardest and most necessary things, because we are usually terrible judges about how good we are as drivers in the first place, and as we get worse at driving, our judgment does not exactly get better. The way to find out that it's time should not be by injuring or killing a pedestrian. Or another driver. Or your own passenger.
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@projfan ps- I have a friend whose son has adopted a different religion from her and had stated flatly he would not abide by her wishes that are different from his. She chose not to name him a health care proxy for this reason.
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@projfan
So the AAA used to have a driving assessment for people- measuring reactions and driving ability in general. That is one way for an unbiased way to decide, but many elders wont like it and it is not free. In CT, a doc or family member can ask the DMV to have an older person retake a driving test. Other dangers are people who might leave things cooking and forget or wandering. I agree having a younger person as a health care proxy is important and also that they agree to abide by your wishes and not theirs, if different. Its also possible to have a document called a durable power of attorney that can spring into place if a person gets dementia at a future time. You and I do agree on these things, and I may someday have to face them personally, as you have.