How do I get mentally prepared for chemotherapy?

Posted by missmollyd @missmollyd, Sep 20 2:52pm

I’m assessed 10/14/25, to see if I’ve healed enough from my DM to begin chemotherapy. I’m more anxious for chemo than I was for the DM with reconstruction.

How do I become a light throughout chemo treatment? I want to be a strong woman. I want to make my people proud. I want my daughter to see me as strong and determined—not scared and timid.

Admittedly, I’m terrified. I am trying to find something to cling onto in order to get through the 12 weeks but I’m coming up short. It’s all so different for everyone.

How did you set your mindset before chemo and stay walking in the light? Yes, I know there will be bad moments and I pray to God I can handle them with grace. But, what do you tell yourself? How do you keep going? When you want to quit, what helps you walk back in there?

I feel so alone with this but I guess I’m really not. Strangest. Feelings. Ever.

TLDR: I’m scared to start chemotherapy. I feel like I don’t know how to stay positive or walk in the sunshine. Help?

Interested in more discussions like this? Go to the Breast Cancer Support Group.

katgob | @katgob | Sep 20 6:12pm

Fear is normal. I will share that I had 12 rounds in a row. I DID NOT GO ON GOOGLE but once and I found that most side effects did not happen. I had been told or read on Breast cancer.org that I might use ice on my fingers to prevent neuropathy. I brought ice but never used it. I talked of my fear to the infusion nurse. It is a 20 minute to 30 for the set-up of the infusion. If you have a port, it is so much easier. They infusion usually comes with a couple items like Benadryl and a steroid in the IV line to allow the chemo to be easier or smoother for nausea prevention. The chemo itself did not hit me directly. The first day I had it Saturday and then Fridays for 11 more weeks. Over the 12 weeks, i only felt icky on the Sunday. My 3rd infusion nurse gave me info that worked. She said nausea comes with chemo. Many people get Zofran that you take every 5 to six hours. I started it Saturday night. This nurse said add a different nausea med and do that then the next 5-hours Zofran, then 5 hours a different one. I took it Sunday to Thursday and took none on Friday. WHAT I DID NOT DO WAS TAKE A LAXATIVE. Zofran makes you constipated. I did end up with issues, so I say use the nausea meds and a laxative. Ask your nurses, as once they start the very first day of chemo it takes longer, so they are monitoring you.

Also, the 2nd day I started wearing stretch bracelets. Each week i removed one. Once hit six, I put six more on and started over. I loved when the last one was removed. Eating was a whole different thing. I ended up only drinking Crystal Geyser water. Freaky, but it was the only thing that tasted good. You will come to know what you can eat, and what you can drink. I ate a bunch of meat and had graham crackers and tortilla chips stocked up. Then added sourdough bread as the weeks went by. Watermelon. I seldom ate meat, so that was interesting. I could also eat the snack taco at Del Taco. It took a few months after chemo for more normalcy. The nurses said just eat the healthiest you can and drink plenty of water. Half your body weight in ounces of water.
The Chemo's themselves are different. I had Carboplatin/Taxol. Two of them. One at a time. I had the "Red Devil" one 3 weeks after my 12, but I had a bad reaction and then went to Lynparza pills.

Above all else, know the medical team is monitoring you. If you have a reaction, your body says yikes, then they are there to help. This is what they do every day. I only had one inattentive nurse for my infusions. All other 11 nurses answered every question I had. They are the biggest jewel on your journey.
Above all else know all of us have different reactions and many of us have few of the side effects people worry about. Go to the subject line above and put chemo side effects. Many on this site have had the same worry you did.
We are here for you. Treat yourself with kindness.

missmollyd | @missmollyd | Sep 20 6:29pm

Great advice. I’ve stayed off google as well. The only searching I have done is on this website. I have learned really quickly that cancer is different for everyone. It’s incredible and such an enormous community. I haven’t found many recommended books. Know any? I’m still learning everything and feel inadequate in the drs offices. I couldn’t find a new version of “breast cancer for dummies.” Lol those are quite informative books ya know?

Thanks for getting back to me. I copied and pasted it to a doc to refer to later. Thanks again!❤️

dave56pa | @dave56pa | Sep 20 8:01pm

Hiya it’s Dave in Pa
My wife had her bout with breast cancer and received the red devil but we all called it the Red Warrior. Even had the drs and nurses saying it. BTW the wife’s been Ned for 1-1/2 yrs

katgob | @katgob | Sep 20 9:09pm

In reply to @missmollyd "Great advice. I’ve stayed off google as well. The only searching I have done is on..." + (show)

breastcancer.org. is the first site i joined and MDS brought me here. you can search on bc.org for books. Susan Love is one author.

Colleen Young, Connect Director | @colleenyoung | 2 hours ago

In reply to @missmollyd "Great advice. I’ve stayed off google as well. The only searching I have done is on..." + (show)

@missmollyd, you might be interested in this related discussion that @roch started a while back when she was about to start chemotherapy:
- Preparing for Chemotherapy: What are your tips?https://connect.mayoclinic.org/discussion/preparing-for-chemotherapy/

@dave56pa, I love how you and your wife flipped the switch on calling the Red Devil to the Red Warrior. It completely refocuses the purpose of treatment to one of fighting cancer. It sounds like it was a good visual for your wife and helped to give her strength.

@missmollyd, how are you doing as you prepare to start this phase of treatment?