You do have a problem and I'm so sorry. Fortunately, my husband with Alzheimer's is sweet and affectionate, not angry. I don't know what I'd do if he were behaving like your husband. I'd like to hear from others about his to handle a combative spouse in case I even need to face that. I get it about your husband performing well in front of the doctor. My hubs' neurologist (PA) asks him how he's doing and he says, "Fine." She does a lot of talking and everything he says makes sense, or it did the last time we were there. I don't think the medication she has him on is doing any good. His heart medicine is more important as far as I'm concerned. We're fighting a losing battle here. The question is how to manage it. When hubs is angry, do you talk back or what? At the very least, I'd never take him to the grocery store with you again. I've had to take the car keys away and that's not gone down well. Explaining the reasons doesn't seem to register with my husband. I'm beginning to sneak around and fib about where I'm going and I hate that, but I don't know what else to do. I can still leave him home alone. When that changes, I'll really be in a tight spot. He seems happy enough. I'm the one who's in pieces about this, and I have it easier than many others.

Can you video tape him when he is in pain or having trouble walking, talking, etc? Then you can show the doctor what you are seeing.