Hi Roseanne,
I'm so sorry to hear of you and your husband's problems! That is hard to cope with. I don't blame him for not wanting to take the medications because of the side effects. Sometimes the side effects can be worse than the problem. I'm sorry that you have cancer. You have a lot to handle.

Maybe you should just try telling your husband how much you love him whether he wants to hear it or not. Remind him of how you fell in love with him or how nice it was when you first met. That might help him through his depression. It also helps to minimize all the current problems. My husband died a year ago of lung cancer. We told each other often how much we loved each other and I'm so glad we did. Because when he was gone, we couldn't say that to one another anymore.

Make sure you take care of yourself and your cancer. Plan some time just for you and whatever helps you or do something that you enjoy. Your body needs some relaxation in order to fight the cancer.

Prayer also works! Just ask God for his help for both of you and help will come. God was there for me and my husband often. Now my husband is up in Heaven and we'll be together eventually. However, I still need help from God now that I'm alone and I am getting a lot of answers to my prayers!
I'll say a prayer for both you and your husband.
I wish you the best.
PML