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He wants a divorce; we are both turning 70
Just Want to Talk | Last Active: Sep 7 5:50pm | Replies (68)Comment receiving replies
Were you both living off of your money, or does he have income/savings too? Were you using your IRA for everything, or drawing it down just for the things he wanted? What will he be living on (a new girlfriend/spouse) after he is gone?
This guy is not your friend, and probably never was. Good thing you cut him off before he drained everything.
(I knew a guy who spun good tales about his wealth but lived off of at least 3 women at one time, like a lazy susan. One was a psychiatrist $$, another a physician $$, and the third wealthy enough for him to take off with and marry, after bilking the first two out of $100K with his promises. The DA would not prosecute him because the jury would not see fraud, just gullibility).
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He has his own income as he is a retired veteran and has his retirement pension and some disability. When we met he was living very frugal as his income did not include SS for nearly 7 years. It seems now that he has enough to live on "well" without my income, he sees no reason in staying together.
During the first years from my IRA and SS Disbility I provided ALL the "finer things", so he wasn't living paycheck to paycheck in a dilapidated old old house with leaky windows, etc: a newer house, a new car (or two), new RVs, travel money; basically anything other than food or shelter.
I also paid for life insurance on him, until he turns 70 this year (then it just gets too expensive for me to pay). When we bought the first house I had to beg him to get life insurance because if something were to happen to him, I would not be able to keep the newer houses we bought together.
We would have rather big arguments about why it was important that if I lost him, I would have to move out of our home. He didn't offer to pay for the life insurance...that gave me a sense of unease....that he was NOT thinking of MY future, only his? Was I seeing this correctly do you think?
I guess I have been a "patsy"?
The problem is, is that he has assured me we would be together forever, so I have been spending as if that were true, loving him all the while.
This is hard to deal with in my head.
What bothers me a lot is now that we have decided to divorce, he doesn't seem empathetic to how I will now be living: like he was living when I met HIM ten years ago. I will be living paycheck to paycheck now.
I just want to die. No one can be trusted in life.