My oldest is now 29 and he is working through my similar diagnosis. Both of my boys are dealing with it in their own way. One is trying some counseling. One keeps in inside.

I enjoy doing my normal stuff. I have done some things because of this….making sure our financial house is in order. Cleaning up some messes that I should have years ago(my garage!!!).

My cousin(whose husband died of a rare brain cancer) told me that she went to a caregiver workshop and the question was asked how many of those with cancer think about it all the time. Very few hands went up. The next question was for caregivers: how many think about cancer all the time? Most hands went up.

After the shock wears off and the mini-pity party for me, I now just focus on quality time. No matter what I do, I want to to be worth my time.

I start a clinical trial Wednesday with photodynamic therapy and immunotherapy followed by standard chemo. I may be in palliative care, but I want to be in care so long that I need to plan hip replacement surgery in about 10 years!

Trust me, your dad knows how hard it is for all of you. That is what I think about: not how it affects me: rather how it affects those who love me.

I’m sorry that you have to deal with this diagnosis. But, it is not the end. It is only the beginning of the fight.