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Dealing with a Spouse with a “Mild Cognitive Impairment”
Caregivers: Dementia | Last Active: 3 hours ago | Replies (339)Comment receiving replies
My wife is on track with your
husband
in my 14th month
i am diagnosed as " overwhelmed with MY TIME for 3x workouts, going swimming - just GONE
Linda complains about LITTLE THINGS that sre i significant in the big picture!
Cannot run the ceiling fan in the kitchen.,.., she runs the lights what is permissible to be turned on. Our favorite restaurants are G O N E
dancing at the Eagles on Friday evenings when there is a good band - once at the end of April to renew my dues - never been back.
Told by my church i am "Disturbing the Sheep" for wanting a female companion to just do outside activities with.
Linda does not "comprehend" a simple sentence. Does not understand .... or she GETS DISTRACTED and interrupts with seeing a fly or seeing something move outside the car window.
And the neurology people came up with "mild impairment" from the CTscan.
And, now the paper testing follow the number then the next alphabet letter drawing a line, remembering words to repeat later, counting backwards, she PASSED 26 out of 30...... now Linda's new DETERMINATION IS RECOVERING FROM DEPRESSION
really? REALLY? They do mot want to see her until the END OF DECEMBER....
and, recovering from depression is OUTSIDE THEIR SCOPE!
I have no female in her right mind to talk with?
No person to go on walks, canoe, dance, baseball games, she did water aerobics MWF but this THIS is working out her DEPRESSION?????
Give me a break!
Such unfairness from the Medical World...waiting 5 months for a NEUROLOGICAL APPOINTMENT .... and THIS is what they say.
Replies to "My wife is on track with your husband in my 14th month i am diagnosed as..."
My husband has Alzheimer's. He was diagnosed a couple of years ago but he's been slipping for much longer than that. At first, I was annoyed by his behavior (repetition ad nauseum) but I was mostly angry at what was happening to us. The anger was bitter and not helpful but I think it's a normal part of adjusting to this new life as caregiver for someone who used to be a partner. Then I felt overwhelmed and helpless. What to do? What needed to be done? See a lawyer? Take over the finances? Take away the car keys? Now I've seen the lawyer, am up-to-date on the finances, and still allow my husband to drive to the places he's most familiar with. When the time comes, I'll take the keys, but he needs to hold onto as much independence as he can for as long as he safely can. The important thing for you is to find a support team, which could be just one person if you can talk openly and honestly to him/her. If not a friend, a therapist or social worker with experience dealing with dementia. This is so much harder on you than it is on your wife, so you must be proactive about your own self-care, and that means doing things differently than in the past. A place to vent is so important but be sure the person you vent to is sympathetic. You can't solve the problem, so advice can just be annoying. A patient listener is almost as essential as the doctor. Patience and courage. Good luck. It's a long haul.
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So sorry that you aren't receiving the help you need. I can be hard to diagnose dementia and its cause. Depression can be a symptom. That can respond to with medication. Dementia not so much. You know what YOU know. You don't really need someone to comfirm it. In the meantime, I would address the depression. That can help relieve some of the symptoms your wife is experiencing. I am not a doctor. I am just trying to give you other ways to think about it. Maybe it would help. It would be nice if you had a companion but that can get messy. Hopefully if some of the depression symptoms are relieved, your wife might be more interested in joining you for walks, etc.