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Dealing with a Spouse with a “Mild Cognitive Impairment”
Caregivers: Dementia | Last Active: 3 hours ago | Replies (339)Comment receiving replies
It is comforting to read everyone's comments and know that I am not alone. I cannot vent to my friends because they just end up disliking my husband. He was diagnosed with MCI in 2003. He continues to decline a little each year. He can't really caring on a conversation because he cannot follow a thought. He was a highly intelligent engineer and it is difficult to see his inability to process basic information. I realize now that his inability to process is partly due to his lack of memory. He has been struggling to read "On Tyranny" by Timothy Snyder. It is a very short book and to the point. But he can't relate because he doesn't remember any American history or people in the past that have shaped our Country. He doesn't want to give up until he understands but I cannot keep explaining over and over again without losing my mind. He is like a bulldog and just can't let go. It is really troubling when he gets like this. Do any of you experience something similar with your spouse?
Replies to "It is comforting to read everyone's comments and know that I am not alone. I cannot..."
Try letting him watch the history channel and taking the book away.
My spouse has gotten pretty angry as this disease progresses. He tells me what to do and when to do it. Mostly he has no idea that I have done certain things. I explain and he either gets angry or he thanks me.
I just went in to the kitchen and found his glasses on the floor. He is sleeping in bed at the moment. I also found an orange inside the garbage disposal. None of it makes sense. He does odd things most days. This disease will stress you out if you let it. No rhyme or reason for some behaviors. I have noticed he responds to different things everyday. He now wants Pizza everyday. If I say I will make something you like he tends to go with the flow. I cannot wait to find out why he did the orange and glasses today I don't want him to think he is not valued, because he certainly is. You have to laugh or you will end up being stressed out. He will call our son and say things that are not facts..but my son gets it and just will reassure me that he cares and loves us both! 🫂
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I appreciated your comments about sharing this challenge with friends. On top of everything else, I have felt very hurt by comments by three close friends who displayed a real lack of empathy/compassion bordering on distain/disgust because my husband tends to repeat some of his favorite stories. We are talking about occasional encounters and stories of a few minutes duration. The reaction says more about them and their fears but it still hurts. I now avoid these folks. They know the diagnosis. I would never say such an unkind remark, especially to the spouse/carer. I am in the process of trying to make some friends who are kinder and more understanding, as I said in the beginning - on top of everything else.