Hi martha7979, Welcome to Connect. I have not experienced any of what you are describing for your husband. But, I think that I can understand his feelings of depression and anxiety because of the length of time that he has continued to struggle post surgery. I can understand the fear of the unknowing if this will ever be resolved, because it reminds me of our (husband and me) pre-transplant state of mind.
Where is your husband now? Is he home? In hospital of care facility? What are the doctors telling him about his ability to regain any of his quality of life?

I want to invite you to take a look at the Discussion Groups on Connect - https://connect.mayoclinic.org/groups/ - because that is a good place to meet others who experienced similar health conditions as your husband. It can be comforting to talk to someone else who has gone thru a similar surgery. If you don't see one that is similar, you can begin a new discussion. That way others will be able to see it. If you want help to post a new discussion, let me know and I will help you.

How are you doing with all of this stress and uncertainty? On Connect there is a Caregiver Group where you, too, can meet others who are caring for their loved ones in a variety of difficult circumstances. I know that you will be welcome there.