I have been seeing a rheumatologist for 3 years now..(I live very rural and not many in this area)..the 1st time I saw him he was on a TV (he also works at a VA in NY..I live in OK). Prior to my visit he required 18 vials of blood for blood work.. I analyzed my results and found a SCL 70 1.0 Pos /Homogeneous titer.. I asked him alot of questions.. he asked me "why are you asking me questions my medical students should be asking? (Well because I didn't when my husband had cancer..and he died) so then he started to cry and proclaimed it a miracle and said I don't have it.. and we Praised the Lord! (And I threw out the hydroxychloroquine pills he had sent ..prior to my visit ..and after having my eyes cleared for the meds..and a $600 new pair of glasses). 2nd year same thing only SCL70 was now 3.0 pos.. this time I saw him in person.same thing.. "miracle you don't have it".. THIS year.. after so many horrible years of being so ill and developing pyloric stenosis..which he said "gastro" had to deal with. he had an assistant..who didn't order the usual 18 viles of blood work and I had to request the SCL70 .. which was now down to 2.0 pos.. this young man told me "we can't rule it out"..and since my significant other was with me.. (he lost his wife and a daughter..and he's had enough loss in his life..didn't want to frighten him) I replied.. "wouldn't I be losing weight? (I had been down to 98 and 104 for along time.. now up to 157 ..too fat!) and he said "not necessarily" ..so I said .. then I am going to expect either my kidneys or my heart will fail.." YES was his response.. and then the DR came in but he was preoccupied with getting at tribal contract he had a meeting with in 15 min..so he'd asked me for a scripture for him the last year and I had one and he just t was "Wow Holy Ghost.. and all of that.. so..I am a believer.. but where is MY MIRACLE??? He got the contract.. and now they tell me he's very busy and I can't see him until IDK when..and I am 71 and have spent the better part of 3 years in bed.. with a few good days.. so does anyone know if the hydrochloraquine pills will slow the progression of systemic scleroderma manifesting in the digestive system??? I am really quite frustrated at this point.. quality of life is about zero (please excuse the religious vernacular if it offends you..it is part of the story ) ..He's not going to cost me my faith in God .just sort of losing trust in him.. what does anyone thing about this?..I'm not sure what to do.. except try to get back in and see him.. and pray!! thank you all for reading this and this wonderful forum!!