I’m sorry that you’re having such a rough time with this, it’s not uncommon to go through difficulties finding a medication but in your experience and also mine, we have limited access to resources so we pretty much have to do our own research, I’m still not in a good place and it worries me especially when my physical health is not good, I’m struggling to keep weight on because my mental health robs me of things like appetite and sleep and this just adds to the stress. I sincerely hope that you will find help for yourself, try not to get discouraged and keep reaching for new ideas, it’s about all we have so we have to keep trying, also if you can find a homeopath in your area, they have different options for you and it’s often very helpful.