Thank you for coming here to share your story and look for understanding and answers. I am encouraged that you are working with a psychologist and continue to look for answers and solutions for what bothers you. I am not an expert in anything, so I will just share about myself, my thoughts and my impressions. In your case, I believe your current emotional/mental status is directly related to your physical events and ongoing difficulties. I am 6 years post-transplant (only one)and had a difficult first year with diminishing difficulties each year that passes. Your issues have been much more extreme than mine were, so I am not surprised that you are still suffering. My suggestion to you would be to also look into some grief counseling. After all, you have experienced the "death" of your health and a near-death experience, which you probably have not addressed as a loss and something you grieve. I also continue to look for answers, in my case I am trying to find a definition for my loss of brain function. Since I cover mine well, there is little interest in addressing the issue. However, like you, I am curious and want to know. Without a diagnosis I cannot find out what to expect and what I may be able to do to lessen any negative impacts of my mental status.
I use a great many stress-relievers (as well as medications) to manage my stress, depression and anxiety. Here is some of my list: meditation, yoga, prayer, research, journaling, talk therapy, attention to diet/nutrition/physical health, and exercising to regain core strength. I do not use all every day, or for every situation. I try one at a time until I can get myself in control enough to maintain my most 'normal' self.
It is hard. Many people do not understand or know. They do not matter. They do not need to understand, they just need to accept. I had to work hard to accept myself and my limitations. It never goes away, but it does get easier over time. You are now on my prayer list for acceptance, healing and comfort. Blessings on your path.

I would like to pull in some previous participants to this particular conversation. Specifically @alyric, @spottedcat83, @crhiggins, @rsinger22, @baceman - I feel like your previous conversations have similarities to what @muriel66 has shared with us. Is anyone willing to again share a similar story or a few words on what has or has not worked for them in their experience with recovery from critical illness?

Thank you, Rosemary. Your suggestions assist me. After the first experience of septic shock, I grieved. After the second experience, I have anger and lethargy. The stress relievers you mention are ones I utilize. When I was at Mayo in 2017, I was asked in occupational therapy to list all the ways to nourish well-being.
The hardest part for me is accepting my limitations. Because I was a very motivated person prior to two experiences of septic shock, it is difficult for me to accept my weariness. I feel as though I am in an empty waiting room for an endless amount of time. I do make a point of seeing weekly each of my closest friends. My husband is the best daily companion in this journey.

@muriel66, I am pleased to read that you are finding some ways to move forward with your life. It is difficult to accept limitations that we can be burdened with. I would like to thank you for your kind words, and I wish I deserved them, but I believe that @2011panc is the one who responded with those helpful suggestions. She is an amazingly strong person, just like you are.
Hugs,
Rosemary