Hi, @kaydas - I understand some of what you've lived with the past 30 years. I was diagnosed with depression, PTSD, anxiety disorder, and suicidal ideation in 2005. I'd been taking an antidepressant for several years before that, and if I hadn't secretly carried around a bunch of garbage in my backpack, doctors probably would have seen it long before that. Mental disorders had a lot of stigma 30 years ago, and it's only marginally improved in the meantime. Unfortunate, but true.

It's a big deal when you find doctors who care enough about you, a person, not just to push drugs. My pcp is always happy when I take a med off my list. He doesn't really talk about lifestyle or nutrition, which could make a difference for many of his patients. I'm pretty much in good shape on those counts. I never complain about having blood draws or tests because, for me, it indicates a level of concern.

We do need the support of others in dealing with our depression et al. Trouble is, a pretty common side effect of depression is isolation. We sometimes fight against ourselves, doing things that make us more depressed, or whatever.

For me, going to a good, welcoming, loving church at least gives me one day a week when I feel better. I went for 8 years, to a church that, to understate it, was the near opposite. I had to find a new, healthy place to worship, for the sake of my sanity.

I look forward to more conversation.

Jim

Hi Jim, I am so glad knowing a little more about you. How wonderful... you were a pastor. Soon you are going to have a golden anniversary with your wife of 45 years. We have only 33 years together. Ten acres of land it is huge. It is time for harvest. What kind of plants and trees do you have there?
Music and Bible... Great combination. I also love to listen to church music. I don't do that often because even a sound of a beautiful music can irritate me. I know it is awful to live in complete isolation and silence. I don't know much about your condition and what you are going through. I am sorry for asking. Can you describe a little more about this condition? I don't care about stigma of mental illness. It is no my fault. It just happened just after my fathers dead. 32 years have passed but for me it is like it happened yesterday. I still live in the past. I basically don't do much. I read and watch some documentaries about health, history and geography. I have no TV. I live in a small apartment with my wife who also have health issues. We live in Canada in the province of Alberta. Soon we will have snow and cold. It will make our life even more difficult. Where you can go if outside is minus 30? We also practicing a meditation and trying to go to the Buddhist temple for meditation. We are not changing our religion, we just like the environment there. Nobody is asking questions. I also used to have dog but he passed. Was very old.
Take care yourself, Jim.
I hope to hear from you.
Kaydas