Okay Jj....I am here, I just joined this forum yesterday, I did not see any of your other posts. I did not know what and how to respond. My fault.. Can you just trust me until tomorrow to ;respond. I was up the entire night lastnight so I'm beyond seeing straight. I just washed up and took my so-called cocktail to see if that will help. I sure hope so. I spent the day in bed and if I can make it I'll be up at dawn and will check back. Sorry no one responded.
Take Care Lynn

Hi @jjwest, We're here. We're listening.
I've very much enjoyed your messages and the support that you've given to others. Thank you. However, reviewing your messages I didn't see a plea for response that went unanswered. But never mind that. I'm here now. And everyone involved in this discussion is here for each other.
Tell us a bit more about you. How can we listen more effectively to what you want us to know?

jjwest- Sorry- I didn't see your email, but I'm glad you are here and I'm sure others are as well. I'm a Army Chaplain-retired after 8 years infantry with the Big Red One, and the last 33 years as a Chaplain Counselor-I'm 71, and feel like I'm about 91. I have Parkinson's, and a number of other disabilities./ but we all do and we all struggle day by day- and this is a great place to vent, no matter how bad things get. They all very caring folks- I have been with this group for the last 7 plus months. I sure will be praying for you my friend and I hope to hear from you. jjames.

Hi jjames, thanks for writing, nice to hear from you. Someday I would like to talk with you about faith. WOW I hear you about feeling older than you are. ME too. Parkinson's, I really don't know much about it, can you tell me about how it affects you? I used to go to church, I was very active, taught teens and adult bible studies. I was even a Stephens Minister Leader for many years. Then my husband died of cancer after three months of being diagnosed. My life changed completely. Some say that we make ourselves sick, maybe so but I am not totally convinced. I want so much to be able to talk with someone who will truly listen, not judge, not try to compare, but true empathy. Understand what I mean? I will try to keep posting, and TRY to be as positive as I can muster. I have a history of not staying with things for a long time, I work on that daily.
thanks again...i wish for you...PEACE & LOVE....JJ

I am not sure myself Colleen. I want to share but am afraid I will come across as being a Know-it-all. I like so many others have been through a lot of things in this life, and...."it ain't over yet" 🙂 I want to hear others and be there for them, but I have such a difficult time reaching out. I done that here for the first time in a very ,very long time. As I get older and unable to do the things I want to do due to disabilities, I get down, and I believe I need to hear how others are coping with health and mental issues. Pain is pain! and it is so personal and individual...so what do I want from others ,,,,I may know down deep, but I seem not to be able to put clearly in my mind.
Thank you for responding, hmmm about not seeing my previous post...I saw it so I am not sure why it wasn't seen.
PEACE AND LOVE ...JJ

Good Morning Colleen 🙂 I really am not sure what I want heard, maybe when I share someone may find something similar in themselves and share with me. I found in these life experiences that I have things that happen that help me see things differently then I had before. So like as you do, take something I say and question it. It sounds like you have been a counselor for a long time, Is this right? I was a Stephen's Minister Leader for over 8 years. I USED to be and do a lot of things. Now I have no title, no passions, no way of making awards, no sharing with others. I keep saying I am going to this tiny town's newspaper and seeing if I can find people my age that like to pay games. I used to knit....well golly I used to do many things, I am a mother of three boys, 4 grand children. My first husband died 16 years ago, we had been married for 39 years. Then after 5 years of his death, I remarried, which was horrible. Now I live with a man that I am not married to legally. We have been together for over 9 years now. He is my sweetheart. He helps me so much. There is love and acceptance, We do not marry because if we did the government would penalize him and take away his benefits. Since I have so many health issues, I don't want him to be without these benefits If I die first. We are happy and I am trying to tell myself that is enough. But underneath all of this I hide, because always believed that you do not co habitate. So I feel like I am doing something bad according to my past church people. My three sons are dealing with it. Because John is such a good man, they are coming around. John does not go to church, and he encourages me to go if I want. I don't want to any more.
Share something about myself, well I just did some. I have dealt with death, loneliness,depression,loss of a lot of money, bad marriage, strokes, heart attacks, and 3 way bypass, 7 major surgeries, sever spinal stenosis, obese,perifical neuropothy. I have a pace maker that I depend on 100% of the time. I had a spinal stimulator implanted Feb. 2016. It has helped greatly.
I am on my way to Wally World...TTYL
PEACE & LOVE ...JJ

Hi JJ I really really appreciate your opening up as I have some things similar to you. I would loose my medical
benefit if I were to marry. Yet this weekend and over the last 19 years. I decided that I would be in disobedience
in the eye's of God and its something I know God can not bless, living with someone. I know as Believers in Jesus Christ God's word
says that my purpose is to glorify God. I am in that tough spiritual situation that you speak of and I so much
can relate and thank you for sharing. I decided this week after much prayer (talking to God about the matter)
that I would remain in my home alone except when I choose to go out, then the issue is, if I am seen with
another man, it is considered adultery.........so. It is me and God walking this life. He did not make us to isolate
ourselves from others. God himself made man to communicate with. All must make their own decisions
and deserve the love of others. David Jeremiah.....this week " God loves you, He always has and He always will."
Eliz

jjwest- thanks for sharing what's on your heart and your mind- I wouldn't worry how you say things, just say what's your feeling in your spirit and your heart- I think we have to honest with ourselves and others first ( even if it sounds bad-) to work our way up, to a positive outcome. Make sense I hope? You know all of us, who are hurting with loss or disease, need a friend daily to talk with and to be completely honest- no matter how it sounds- to me that's a true friend, not judging, not telling me how I should act or talk( if it is off color- I will hear that myself as I share and begin to chance my own behavior. I'm really sorry about the loss of your husband, we never forget some one we love ( like a spouse, child, Sister or Brother-or a really good friend. yes, it will get better with time, but time won't stop the memories, it will just help us deal with them better and they will become less disabling). Parkinson's you ask about- I have had it three years now, there is many side affects- but it also depends on the person. I don't shake as much- but I have a real problem with balance, falling once in awhile, eating, a dry and burning mouth-at times. There is much more, look at the Parkinson's site under " The National Foundation for Parkinson's" they list many-many side affect and things we need to be aware of. Hope that's a little help-Gods Blessings and you are in my prayers. jjames