To i hate diabetes....thank you for your concern and caring. I didn't even consider that my post could trigger anybody. I really should know that but i was not thinking clearly about that. I do belong to a forum on line that has an excellent group of forums for suicide loss survivors. They break the forums into categories which are open....like for military or law enforcement or veterans and such. I post on the parents who have lost children site most of the time. And of course there are professional moderators at all times and resources. But there is one group that is closed specifically for posts that could trigger someone.
I think that we do need a safe place to express ourselves. But the other side of that is that a person could get triggered. I don't know everything on this forum but i think everything is public. That is okay with me personally but i think that i would not want to say anything on a forum concerned with mental health that might be a trigger.
Your story about your mother also made me think of my mother as she had serious mental issues that were hard to deal with.
I am so glad you have found ways to deal with stuff and i think the ideas of being in nature and having faith are good for me, anyway, to remember. I am so sorry you had to deal with such trauma at such a young age. Thank you for sharing and my prayers are with you.