I have gotten talk therapy over the years and the therapists all said they could find nothing that was causing it--it is just a genetic depression. It goes up and down, but I never get mania. I am on pills that have helped level out some of the ups and downs, but I still go into bad depression. It is just for shorter periods. I have seen no reduction in my GAD. It seems to be getting worse. I see a spychiatrist and talk with him about every two months. The problem is that I get used to the medication and now I seem to have gotten used to all the medications that I can take. Some have side effects that are contraindicated due to other conditions I have. I have neuropathy so yoga would be difficult for me. My muscles are weak due to it. Thank you for your suggestions. I do appreciate your taking the time to reply and offer some suggestions. I am glad you have found some relief.

@johnhans
Depression wears a person down. When I'm more depressed than usual, I just want to stay in bed, or in the recliner, shopping for bargains, looking things up. Normally, I just go through life slowly, do a little bit of work, do just what has to be done. On Mondays, I'm committed to visiting 4 Hospice patients, so I leave home and get back between 5 and 6. Sadie is always with me, and during the visiting, she makes a lot of people smile. That's my only regular weekday commitment, but I have a doctor's appointment most weeks. On Sunday, we leave home at 9:30, go to church, and spend the afternoon shopping and resting in the car at a park. I walk with Sadie at the park, so she can get some exercise before time for the evening service at church. In the evening service, I play the piano and lead the worship time. We get home at 8, so it's a really long day. Often my feet hurt up to 6 or 7 when I spend a day in town, whether it's on Sunday, or a day we have appointments. Any day we go to a doctor, it means a day of shopping, mostly at thrift stores.

I tend to say a lot to express a thought. Being depressed doesn't necessarily shut me down like it used to. I just do what I have to, without the pleasure or enjoyment I used to.

Do you have any volunteer work that you do? I've found that helping others has brought back a little sense of meaning to my life. Life was meaningless, and I felt worthless, hopeless and like I was a burden to my family from 2005 until this last year, when I've made some progress with my mental health. It would be great if there were a pill or a magic formula that would instantly stop depression and anxiety and suicidal thoughts.

But, until that happens, life goes on a minute at a time.

Jim

To: @jimhd @gailb @lesbatts @johnhans @safetyshield @johnjames @georgette12 @rspaulling Over the past few weeks, I've been reading your posts and I'm so pleased to see how you share your feelings, your weakness but most of all your strengths as you have dealt with depression as well as physical problems for many years. Your responses and replies to each other offer encouragement and new ideas which are so important in dealing with mental health issues. You also offer hope to the Mayo Connect Community as a whole. Just needed to say a big "THANK YOU" to you all. You have all blessed me. Hugs to each of you, Teresa

Hi Jim, as I mentioned previously I have been on some 30 drugs for my Bipolar Disorder. Some medications would work for a while then I'd get sick again. My doctor finally tried Parnate which is an older class of drugs know as MAOI's. Some doctors don't like to prescribe them as they have drug and food contraindications. I've been on them for at least 10 years and they are still working. I also eat some of the forbidden food and have never had a problem. It gets high marks from people that are on it. Look it up on Web MD, or RX list. It works great for atypical depression.
Don't get me wrong now, I still get depressed now and again but it's usually short and mild.
Good luck Jim I hope you're feeling well soon.

Leslie

Thank you so much for your kind words. I always learn from communicating with others. And, I love sharing things I have learned over the years.

No I do not volunteer. Because of my disabilities I find that places are not willing to take me as a volunteer. I have tried and been rejected. I need to use a walker and also use paratransit which is limited in where it goes so that makes it hard for me to get into any kind of volunteer work. I need to have someone come in and help with the housework because of my disabilities so I am limited in that respect. I wish I could afford a retirement community where they have scheduled activities where I do not need to go out, but those places are way to expensive for me. I did recheck the latest list of services for senior services in my area and found even less than before. The only one listed does not even operate in my county. Otherwise it is nursing homes and retirement communities.
I am glad that you are able to help out others in their last days. That is a great thing to do. I am also glad that you have a church to go to. My church closed up and I have not been able to find another where the paratransit goes as weekend service area is reduced. I will keep looking as I am not one to give up. No one said life was easy, we all have our problems to deal with. As you said life goes on minute by minute. Just like it has for all the many previous years I have made it through.