Thanks so much jervl.

this really brings up another issue for me.
according to the research there is a significant lack of research and agreement on how many kegels to do a day (the only big meta-analysis specifically on male incontinence following RARP)
So I hear many recommendations to do three sets of as many as 20-30 slow contractions (kegels) One person recommended 10-15 every hour. My urologist recommended three sets of 30 long slow ones ( 15 seconds) I asked about quick ones as well and he did not think they were important
However,
1. many experts recommend slow and fast kegels ( either one or two second short ones followed by one or two second relaxation/rest, and then ten to 15 second long ones followed by ten or 15 second rest sessions) This really makes sense and the research seems to support it
2 I wish 'more were better' but I can definitely tell that my pelvic floor muscles get tired/sore/stiff over-used later in the day, sometimes they are tight for hours. The PT I am seeing has advised me to work on form and only do two sets a day.
3. I guess in years to come some agreed upon recommendations backed by research will be out there. I tend to think I need to be careful not to do too many. I wish I could do more 'work though the pain' ( no pain no gain" but I feel like that has already backfired on me a little I would love some more opinions on this however