I can't imagine what you are going through but others feel this way, too. It is a huge loss of independence simply to not be able to drive, among all of the other ways epilepsy impacts people. My daughter is 23 and going through similar challenges. Alcohol is her biggest trigger and everyone she meets her age drinks ALOT and all they do on weekends is hit the bars. Even if she doesn't mind drinking soda all night, she doesn't have fun when everyone is drunk and she is sober. Dating is hard because she lives at home. She has been suicidal several times and having a therapy program that used DBT (Dialectical Behavioral Therapy) saved her multiple times.

Are you being seen at Mayo? We received completely different treatment there than our home hospital offered!

I also wonder if joining a church or volunteering somewhere that helps you get to know a group of people outside of your family would be helpful. I am not religious anymore so I joined Rotary and have a lot of opportunities to get to know people that way. I know there are "meetups" online, too, where complete strangers meet around some common interest and I know lots of people who made friends that way. Also, living in a big city where everyone uses public transportation is an option to take away the frustrations and stigma of not driving. If that is possible.

Have you thought of getting a seizure dog? There was a great discussion on here recently about that. However, any pet can really help combat loneliness and help you feel a sense of purpose. Some dogs have seizures and they hard to find families for...:)

I know this might not be helpful and it would be better if my daughter were here to speak for herself, but you are not alone in feeling this way. Even when she wasn't suicidal, she often spoke of just waiting for life to end because it is such a struggle. It breaks my heart because we love her so much. It sounds like you are loved by your family as well but I understand wanting more. I hope you can find it.