I agree however, and I know this is a stereotype- many surgeons/urologists can get defensive-
Being tactful, perhaps telling the surgeon/urologist, that this is all new and things are happening very fast Being made aware of cancer, then perhaps friends and family relating their experiences and advice. being bombarded with information and then having to make important life decisions is worth many opinions and careful consideration.

It might be helpful to make us (the patients) the ones that feel inadequate and fearful, taking this away from the doc.