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Does the word “cancer” make friends uncomfortable?

Prostate Cancer | Last Active: Apr 27 9:32am | Replies (14)

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@scottbeammeup

This reaction is natural. People think "wow, if this can happen to Scott who exercises so much and eats right it can happen to ME." If you push past this, things can be better.

Most people I told asked if I needed any help. The reality was I didn't, but I gave them all small tasks: "Would you mind picking up half a gallon of milk for me when you go to the store, I don't feel up to going today," "Could you bring my trash can in on Thursday," "Can I have a ride to the train station Friday" etc. This made them feel useful and also gave them something to start a conversation rather than avoiding me (and put to rest the "but you don't look sick" comments as well): "Hey, I'm going to the store Friday, do you need anything." "No, but have you been watching < show name>." It's a total non-sequitur but nobody noticed.

Also, a surprising number of people talked to me 1:1 about their own cancer experiences.

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Replies to "This reaction is natural. People think "wow, if this can happen to Scott who exercises so..."

Thanks for the advice. Yes, there is a certain amount of “how can he have cancer? He’s really healthy!” My skating coach told me that, since I had cancer, I could skip the final meet of the season but I insisted on competing and I made the podium with silver - second place. And the next oldest man in my class was 18 years my junior!
I appreciate that Tom, my cycling coach, has set the bar high for me knowing I have an aggressive form of PC.
Incidentally, I am 67 years old.