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We All Need A Coping Mechanism
Prostate Cancer | Last Active: Apr 13 11:54am | Replies (11)Comment receiving replies
Hans
I didn’t think that you could write anything more enjoyable,informative and at the same time, entertaining then ‘Welcome to Prostate Cancer. A Playbook for the un-initiated. Well, this post today is right up there as best seller for all of us going through this ordeal. I highly recommend it to anyone new to this process. I like many wonder what the future holds for me. My highest PSA before my diagnosis was 2.51. 10 months earlier it was 1.33 so I insisted on the next diagnostic test- An MRI with and w/o contrast. My urologist had suggested a wait and monitor since I was not at or above 4. I said no. I was told if the MRI suggested cancer I would have to have a biopsy and was I sure I wanted to go that route after all my PSA was not out of this world. I said I am not taking any chances, especially since my father had prostate cancer. The MRI showed I had a Pi-Rad 5. 2 weeks later I had the biopsy of my prostate and to my horror it revealed a Gleason 8.
I then started the journey to decide what treatment protocol I would follow. I met with surgery and RO and each said there were risks and benefits of each and it was my choice, like I was selecting between chicken or steak from the menu. 1 week later I had my PSMA Pet Scan that showed no evidence of avid met disease, so I opted for surgery. 5 weeks later I had my NSRP and now have a Gleason 9 Grade Group 5 with extra prostatic extension so I started wondering whether I made the right decision, still in disbelief given my low PSA and my PSMA results.
I am now 8 weeks post NSRP and my PSA is CURRENTLY < .1 and thus by definition undetectable.
In addition to my conitued battle with incontinency and the inability to live life as I knew it before, I also have to decide what I will do if and/or when the PSA become detectable and what my quality of life will be like for me, my wife, children and grandchildren. I will soon turn 70 and feel good other than the obvious dependence on my depends, but worry about my future, my morbidity and my mortality, all of which I never let consume me.
I write this for myself and also for the newly diagnosed and un-initiated as I have learned so much from so many others this platform that I realize now more than ever we are all in this together whether we like it or not. My God gives us all the courage and strength to kick this disease’s butt.
Replies to "Hans I didn’t think that you could write anything more enjoyable,informative and at the same time,..."
Hey bud, if I can be so bold, I’d say you not only made the right decision, but the best one as well. Your surgical pathology revealed the true aggressive nature of your disease and taking out that central node of cancer was the first step, bar none.
If your cancer recurs you still have the option of radiation and ADT. Yeah, yeah we hear all the ranting, kvetching and moaning against it but it just might save your life.
I just finished both, and although I wished I could have avoided them, nature had other plans for me.
But the whole process wasn’t SO bad - it was an intrusion into an otherwise happy retirement and it did present challenges and discomforts…but here I am, bent but not broken.
I am 6 yrs post surgery so I commiserate on the drips, leakage and all that; I still have a shelf of diapers, pads and mattress covers left over from those early days….see, you CAN get better with time. And you will. Best,
Phil
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Thank you for your eloquent chronicle of prostate cancer. You navigated the diagnostic labyrinth with admirable stubbornness, told the urologist “thanks but no thanks” to the waiting game, and somehow turned a PSA of 2.51 into a Gleason 9 plot twist. That takes talent. Or at least very determined genetics.
The image of surgeons offering cancer treatment options like entrées—“Would you prefer your trauma grilled or pan-seared?”—resonates deeply. It’s the gourmet buffet of existential dread.
As for the Depends dependency. Yes, nothing like a daily reminder that your body now leaks on its own schedule. At least your PSA is behaving, which in this world counts as a ticker-tape parade.
Your comment is a sobering reminder that low numbers don’t always mean low stakes, and that courage often looks a lot like confused perseverance sprinkled with sarcasm. Here's hoping your next scan is boring, your continence improves, and your next major decision is which grandkid gets to mow the lawn, not whether to radiate your pelvis.
We are, indeed, all in this together. Unfortunately, no one asked us first.